A Bridge Pro and his wife were having dinner in the restaurant of a very exclusive resort in the Bahamas. The man got up to visit the bathroom and on his way back he received a very passionate embrace from a beautiful blond. His wife noticed this and when he sat down, she asked, "Who was that?"
"Oh," he said sheepishly, "That was my mistress."
"Why you beast!" she said, "I want a divorce."
"O.K." he said, but it means we'll have to give up the place in Aspen, and the estate in Belize, and of course those shopping trips to Europe, and...."
As he was speaking she noticed another Pro dining across the way with a pretty brunette and she said, "Who's that with Wayne?"
"Oh, that's his mistress" was the reply.
She said, "Ours is cuter."
A cleaning woman was applying for a new position and when asked why she left her last employment, she replied: Yessir, they paid good wages, but it was the most ridiculous place I ever worked. They played a game called Bridge and last night a lot of folks were there.
As I was about to bring in the refreshments, I heard a man say: "Lay down and let's see what you've got." Another man says, "I got strength and no length." And another man says to the lady: "Take your hands off my trick." I pretty near dropped dead just then when the lady answered: "You forced me. You jumped me twice when you didn't have the strength for one raise. Another lady was talking about protecting her honor, and two lades were talking and saying, "Now it's time for me to play with your husband and you can play with mine."
Well, I just got my hat and coat and as I was leaving, I hope to die, if one of them didn't say: "Well, I guess we'll go home now. That was the last rubber!!"